Holistic Leadership and Exponential Growth with Jeff Salzenstein

Jeff Salzenstein: I'm not doing it for ego to get in front of 25,000. I'm just bringing the energy of like, this is what I would feel like if there's one person in the room or 20,000. I'm bringing the same energy that I want to live in the world to create what I want, not an old energy that's like smaller, lower vibration.

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Melissa Shanahan: All right, back again.

Jeff: Yes. Are you going to put up with me even more?

Melissa: Yeah.

Jeff: Let's go.

Melissa: Yes, let's go.

Jeff: We're just getting warmed up. It's like the middle of a five-set match. Right? Literally, it's the middle of a five-set match and we're, yes.

Melissa: Yes. Yes.

Jeff: We're finding our stride.

Melissa: Yeah. I'm so grateful you're back again. Now we're going to start to get into when our paths crossed. And our paths crossed at the Conscious Entrepreneur Summit in Boulder.

Jeff: Alex Raymond, let's go.

Melissa: Yes, Alex Raymond, let's go. I went to that because I was feeling pretty burnt in the spring. I was looking for a conference to attend. I would have, I would have traveled for it. I was just looking for a place to go with someone to facilitate me and my thinking, because I'm used to facilitating others and their thinking.

And then I saw this one in Boulder. I thought, okay, what's this? This seems cool. And it said Ben Hardy, who I had not fully read some of his books. I knew, but I thought, no, no, no, this is good. Let's go get in a room. And I meet you there. I cross paths with you there, which we talked about, me chasing you down. I can give why I chased you down in just a moment.

But yeah, and little did I know after I met you, you'd you'd been on your own journey, just even yes, you had your story, and there's a story that's out to the world. And then there's a deeper story, which we covered. But then even in the last few years leading up to when I met you, there was like the more of the transformation. So yeah, maybe bridge the gap between beginning of 2023 and when I met you.

Jeff: Sure. So the life, so we all live very full lives, and I feel like I've lived multiple lives. You know, professional tennis player for over a decade, tennis coach, online tennis coach, Tennis Evolution. I grew this incredible platform, a Tennis Evolution, where we impacted millions of people. Like 800 videos on YouTube, 21 million views. I'm known as the serve surgeon. I'm the guy who teaches people how to serve because I had one of the best serves in the world. And so, really became, I would say, a master of my craft when it comes to coaching tennis. And I'm doing all this, and at the same time, I'm on this journey with my brother around drug, his drug addiction, and mental health.

And in 2016-17, I start performance coaching. I start working with people outside of tennis around their mindset and their habits, and their behaviors. And I realize, ooh, I kind of like this. This is what I've been preparing for, studying for. Then I get in a room and I'm with these leaders, and they start hiring me to speak. And I'm like, oh, I'm supposed to speak. And then my brother dies.

And I realize, I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't just play 9 out of 10. I got to play 11 out of 10. This is my calling. You know, I turned 50. We're on the we're on the back nine of life, the next 50 years. What the heck am I going to do to impact? And it's like, oh my gosh, I am going to expand this executive performance coaching way of being where I'm coaching incredible leaders like yourself one-on-one, and we're going deep, and we're creating transformation and change, and then you go out in the world and you create a ripple effect for everyone in your sphere and your influence.

And then I'm like, oh, I got to speak too. And so it was about what, 3 or 4 years ago, when Alex Raymond, who is the founder of the Conscious Entrepreneur Summit, he ran his first event in Denver. It was right around the corner here in RiNo area.

Melissa: Okay.

Jeff: And I go to this first event and I heard about it through my friend Jeff Benton, who does incredible work in the in the world of leadership and focuses a lot on emotional regulation and emotional intelligence, and he follows a lot of the HeartMath Institute principles around getting into coherence. And there's a heart-brain coherence. And so he's going to speak at this event and he's like, you should come to it.

So I go to it, and I am now the, I don't know what you would call it. I don't want to say OG. Maybe I'm the OG, because I've gone every year. Because I get FOMO if I don't go to events like this where they're talking about consciousness and entrepreneurs, and there's people like us in the room, like-minded people that want to make a difference in the world and want to grow their businesses, but also want to have a sense of fulfillment and purpose. So I've been going to this thing every year as I've been evolving as a coach and as a leadership speaker.

And yeah, I walked in there this year, got my new, my new threads, upgrading the brand. And you came up to me. I checked you out. I saw a list of people on the spreadsheet and I'm like,

Melissa: Okay. 

Jeff:  I think I'm supposed to hire this guy. I think he's supposed to be my coach. And so

 Melissa: Wait, I have to say more.

Jeff: It's like this divine, I know, but like this divine confluence of like, it's your first year, my fourth year. Probably my suit helped the brand.

Melissa: No, that’s not why…

Jeff: Get the spreadsheet, my website had been upgraded. Like, all these things are happening for you to be like, I think I'm supposed to work with this guy.

Melissa: Yeah. Yeah, I mean, I had been looking for a coach for a while. And I come from, I have a coaching background. And so…

Jeff: You know what to look for.

Melissa: I hesitate to say this. I know it's… okay, that was the nice way to say it.

Jeff: You know what to look for.

Melissa: I hesitate to say this, but let's be honest, not all coaches are created equal, and some are just better than others. And I'm looking for, there's skill sets, the way they ask questions, how they're framing it, what angle they're taking. There's like nuance and an art to coaching. And so I had been looking for a coach for a long time.

I recently got more serious about it. And didn't I just still couldn't, it just didn't feel right to pull the trigger on working with someone. It just felt like, that might be okay. Anyway, I sort of gave up. And then Natalie, who's behind the cameras right now, made a spreadsheet for me before the conference. And they gave us the list of attendees, which I would have done nothing with. I don't know what to make of it. She put it into a spreadsheet and had AI make a column with one sentence on what their business does.

Jeff: So Natalie should get all the credit for this.

Melissa: Correct.

Jeff: Yes.

Melissa: Yes.

Jeff: Correct.

Melissa: So I…

Jeff: We love Natalie.

Melissa: I just was looking down that column. It was on my phone. So I didn't even see all the columns at once. I saw I was looking down the column. Oh, that's cool. That's cool. That's cool. That's what that business does. That's what that business does. And I get to one that says, performance coaching for founders and CEOs, and then something about the Own Your Zone™ framework. I was like, what is that? Scroll over. I see your name. So then I go check out your website, and then I check out your LinkedIn, and I was like, this is my guy. I have been looking and looking. This is like when someone when you're looking for a house on the market,

Jeff: Yeah.

Melissa: And you look and you look and you look and you try, you realize what's a what's the good value, bad value, not quite right. You have a sense of it all. And I'm telling you, I had done a bunch of work previous to this. So when I saw your name and I looked up the stuff, I was like, yep, let's go.

Jeff: Let's go. And we did. And we went. And what's so beautiful about our connection is that we show up at this event, and every year there's a theme. And this year's theme was about how do you 10X your business. And Benjamin Hardy is the keynote speaker. Like that's how we started this coaching relationship. Like I have Own Your Zone, but I also tailor to what I tailor hard to what the person needs.

And you came to me, you were like, there are certain things I want to work on. I'm going to let you share, and I'll ask you a few questions, but there are certain things I want to work on that are really important to me. But we really started with this 11 out of 10 concept and creating a vision because it was all based around the theme of that summit. It wasn't based around anything else other than we both were at that summit. You bought the books, you're going through Ben Hardy's stuff. You want to 10X, you want to, but you don't want to do it, you want to 10X without losing yourself, without burning out.

Melissa: Yeah.

Jeff: You want to do it in a more fulfilling way.

Melissa: Yeah.

Jeff: And so, why don't you tell me like, yeah, tell me your version of 11 out of 10 and Ben Hardy and the framework and like how we connected on this 11 out of 10 concept and how I started to help you with it.

Melissa: Okay. Well, I don't expect you to listen to my podcast, but a couple of I did a couple episodes on what I learned from The Science of Scaling, which is his new book. And what I said in there, and so I'll just reiterate here, I was skeptical. I am typically skeptical of 10X your business.

I help people with their businesses. And the way that is taught and thrown around in the world is oftentimes shallow or superficial, like 10X for the sake of 10Xing. And I know that's a really crappy way to start out with something. I think it's good to have a vision, but a lot of people that teach that don't teach depth to it and what's under the hood, and like really understanding the foundation of things instead of just flying towards something really fast. It's reckless. Like that's, I've seen it play out in business.

So I'm super skeptical of the hypey language around 10X. And so I wasn't having high expectations. I just wanted to be in a room full of entrepreneurs and having an expert up there.

Well, I was blown away by Ben Hardy. I love his, I love his academic nature. I love, I mean, you're in a room where 50% of the people in there are saying things like, I don't care about numbers, I just care about impact. I'm not that person. I care, I am a blend of things. I care about impact, but also like I'm down to look at the numbers. There's a lot of people in here that are a little like, I just want to do my thing.

And he is very academic tone on stage is saying, you know, you need a number. Like, pick a number. And so I really appreciated his like almost dogma, but not in an unhealthy way. It was just like, okay, I'm going to listen to this. That did open up my mind quite a bit. I realized certain things sitting there that I hadn't realized that I needed to.

And when I started working with you afterwards, I had gotten very clear about, from a business perspective, what the changes that needed to happen, what they were, that I wasn't willing to admit prior to that workshop.

Jeff: Do you want to share the big things that you wanted to work on with me or no?

Melissa: No, yeah, I totally will. Because then when we talk about the Own Your Zone, I'll go into some of the nitty-gritty. But when you and I started working together, at some point, and I will say what we what I really wanted to work on, at some point in WhatsApp, because you do that with your clients. And when I say you do that with your clients, I don't know how many hours I spent on WhatsApp. It was profoundly impactful for me. I needed that, or it wasn't going to I wasn't going to shift.

Jeff: Let me riff off of that for a second.

Melissa: All right.

Jeff: So in my coaching program, we do either two or three calls a month typically. In our case, we did three. But then I allow WhatsApp 24/7. Like if you wake up…

Melissa: And you mean it.

Jeff: If you wake up in the middle of the night at 2:00 AM and something's on your mind, you want to get it out, you drop that message. A lot of people don't use that. And a lot of people kind of joke of like if they're a billionaire, they don't they don't use it, and like they're the best clients because they don't like light up your phone all the time. But you're not a billionaire yet. 

Melissa: I used it all the time.

Jeff: And but what's so interesting is like many coaches might be like, oh man, like she lights up my phone all the time. Like so much like it's the opposite for me. I'm like, oh my gosh, like you're giving us so much juice and so much context and flavor, and it allows me to coach you at a deeper level.

Like I have a client right now, we do a call every 2 weeks, and I don't hear from them in between. I freaking have no idea if he's how he's doing, what he's doing. There's no check-ins. And so in the early stages of our coaching relationship, you were lighting that phone up and that WhatsApp, and I think it was a really important process for you to verbalize out loud and have someone holding space in that way beyond just our calls, because it allowed you to get more clear. It allowed me to ask questions. It allowed me to streamline the coaching even more.

So it's not like it has to happen throughout the whole engagement, and you cooled off. You know, you didn't keep sending me messages every day, but you'd go on your walks, and you would do that, and I think that really helped us, and that helped you move faster.

Melissa: It helps me move so much faster. And that was really my chance to dump. I dumped everything on you. I told you on our initial call, I cannot for the life of me lose weight, and I’m doing this…

Jeff: And up until now.

Melissa: Up until now, okay, that's what we got to talk about up until now, but yes. I wanted to lose weight. I was bigger than I'd ever been, and I felt like I was healthier than I’d ever been.

Jeff: What did you tell me? What did you tell me your vision was that you wanted to have happen based on your body and how it would look? Do you want me to give you the answer?

Melissa: Yeah. Yes.

Jeff: Because coach knows the answer.

Melissa: Okay, I don't remember what it was.

Jeff: You said, I want to stand on stage with you.

Melissa: Yeah, I know that's true.

Jeff: And I want to be proud of how I look on stage.

Melissa: Yes. That is true.

Jeff: Very proud of how my body looks. And you know, that was think about that. That is the pain point for you. I'm hiring you, Jeff, so that we can get on stage together and we can raise our hand and say, I did this. And I asked you back, I'm like, well, you could just hire a fitness trainer to help you get fit.

Melissa: You said to me, this is what you said…

Jeff: And you're like, no.

Melissa: “I'm not, I'm not a fitness coach.” I was like, I know.

Jeff: And so that was interesting, right? Because if you really wanted to change body comp, you could go to a body comp specialist, not to me. And so you didn't do that.

Melissa: No, I knew it was deeper.

Jeff: Right, because you had a vision beyond just that.

Melissa: It was deeper than…

Jeff: The 11 out of 10 vision.

Melissa: Okay. 11 out of 10, which also, I'd never heard that until probably 3 weeks into coaching with you.

Jeff: Yeah.

Melissa: I mean, and this is hours of on WhatsApp back and forth. Yeah. And you said, “Listen, Melissa.” We could probably find this message. “Listen, Melissa, I am here to help you live an 11 out of 10 life and whatever that looks like, that's what we're doing.” And I just thought 11 out of 10 life. I'd never heard that before. Because it’s not like I’d sat through some of your curriculum and then we started coaching.

Jeff: I stole that. I stole that. So I'm not going to take credit.

Melissa: Okay, well,

Jeff: I was in a speaking group for 2 plus years, 2 and a half years called ImpactEleven.

Melissa: Oh, yeah.

Jeff: And it was all about 11 out of 10 your speaking business.

Melissa: I did not know that. Okay.

Jeff: And so, and then now we're 10Xing with Benjamin Hardy. So then I'm like, ooh, now we got this 11 out of 10 X-ing thing going.

Melissa: Yeah, yeah.

Jeff: So I'm not going to TM that and say I did that, but it is like again, it's like a confluence of everything happening in my life. I'm like, ooh, this is what we're going to 11 out of 10. Melissa's life and other people's lives.

Melissa: I mean, I think with the main things I want to work on, that was that was the biggest pain point for me, because of to your point, I forgot that I said that, but how uncomfortable I was.

Jeff: Etched in stone. That's like the most important thing you ever shared with me in the beginning. We're going to be on stage together. I have the vision of you standing on stage with a body that you're proud of.

Melissa: Yeah. Okay.

Jeff: Which is really cool that you're a woman and I'm a man and we're talking about body image and we're talking about body just openly on this podcast because I think it's important. I mean, I go into rooms and I speak in rooms and I do Own Your Zone, and I see a lot of people that are not in the best shape. They're probably not proud of their bodies.

Melissa: But they may not even care.  I did. 

Jeff: They may not care. That's fine. But the fact that's important to you knowing you have so much success in other aspects of your life, but this had this had been a challenge for you based on your past and different things that have happened around, you know, childbirth and your health and habits and all the things. And so you've been working on it, and I'm really proud of you.

Melissa: Thank you.

Jeff: You're amazing at this. Yeah, you've come a long way already. Improved

Melissa: Thank you. I have come a long way. And again, I feel like I'm just getting started. I guess about the body image stuff, here's what I'll say because I mean, there's varying degrees of comfort that we have in our own bodies, and there's varying shapes and sizes of people. I don't need to be, I'm not striving to be some ripped person that's super fit on stage. I'm not looking for that.

But truly, I was really uncomfortable in my body. I was uncomfortable in the weight. My clothes didn't fit as well. And I mean, I know for sure other people have seen that at certain points, and I don't want to go out and buy a new wardrobe. I want to fit into the wardrobe that I have. And it's not even my, it's not like from way back when, it's just from a couple years ago.

So I just knew the work was going to be deep because the normal stuff that I had always been able to do previously was not even touching the like my body wasn't changing when I was trying things that on paper should work, healthy, be more active. I was eating Paleo-ish. I just it, was something was wrong. And I knew I had hormone stuff, yes. Epstein-Barr, yes. So I knew some of that was impacting it, but I wasn't okay. I like internally, I needed help to stay connected to myself, or I did not have a shot at getting, at sort of right-sizing things for myself.

Jeff: And I think that brings up a really good point if we connect it back to like creating an 11 out of 10 life. What I notice in people, especially if they're not aware of it, subconscious mind is powerful. And I know you do a lot of work in the subconscious mind. Shout out to Lacey, who's been a huge help to you and also to me, thanks to you. But like subconscious, a lot of it's stored in our body. You know, the cells of our body store everything. There's a book called The Body Knows the Score.

Melissa: Keeps the Score.

Jeff: Keeps the score and knows the score. And yeah, all the scores. So it's like every event that happens in your life, every thought, every action, every habit, it's all stored in the body, and it's in the fascia, it's in the cells.

But if we look at this 11 out of 10 concept, too many people are living from their past. They're focusing on what's wrong in their life. They're focusing on what happened in the past, and that limits them from being able to do the things that they want to do. And they're just being realistic, right? Realistic about their life and their goals. And in order for you to do incredibly big things in the world, you have to have a vision. You have to see a different version of yourself. Otherwise, you're just going to keep replaying the same version out of your past. You're living from your past.

Melissa: Right.

Jeff: So if you want to get more of what you want, you got to get clear on who you need to become. And I use the word need. I don't like to usually use the word need, but in this case, it feels like that like, who do you need to become? Or who can you become? What do you desire in your life?

And so it's living from a future self, and that is what Benjamin Hardy teaches us. He teaches us to reverse engineer. If you're going to 10X, you have to think about problems differently. You have to think about situations differently. You have to change your behaviors, your habits, who you hang out with.

Melissa: Yes.

Jeff: And that's something that I learned from tennis, because in tennis, you have to visualize yourself winning. You have to see yourself shaking hands before it happens, holding the trophy before it happens. Then you reverse engineer that how that's all going to happen into your practices and your training. Even a tennis serve or a tennis shot revolves around your future self, the future point. You have to see where the ball's going to land in your mind before it lands there.

So we start with the future in mind and we work backwards, whereas most people that aren't getting what they want are living in the past. And that is the big mindset shift people would need to make. If they're not getting what they want, they have to live from their future much more.

And I think Hardy drives that point home. He did that at the summit, and he does that in his books, and he does that in his content. We have to live much more for from our future. And we have to be absolutely delusional with it. And you've seen how I act sometimes. I'm a little bit like out there, or a lot out there, but that's by design because in order for me to get into a state to live from my future, I have to be more of that instead of playing smaller and playing scared and think about, well, this is how it's always been, so I'm just going to do this.

Melissa: I mean, I think living from your future, the alternative of living, if you're not living from your future, you are living sort of incrementally incremental small improvements on what you always have been. And there's nothing wrong with that, but there are certain people, most of the people I deal with, they may not have the vision articulated very well, but they have it. They know if you ask the right questions, they can tell you what they want. Sometimes they don't actually believe that it's possible. So they will say it was like, well, I mean, if in a perfect world, I would have X, Y, and Z or…

Jeff: That's where you have to get delusional.

Melissa: Yes. And so yeah, I think

Jeff: Permission to be delusional with everything.

Melissa: It helps to have someone, because when it's your own stuff, it's very difficult to pull yourself out of the cap that you have on what's possible. So having someone outside of you say, yeah, let's do it. That's that's not crazy.

Jeff: Because most of the people you're hanging out with, your husband, your wife, your kids, your friends, they

Melissa: Other business owners in your circle.

Jeff: They are not thinking delusionally. So you're always going to get that baseline or that floor of like this is how it is. So it is incremental because that's in your environment. So if you don't change the environment, move to a different city, hang out with different people, if you don't do those things, then you better get a coach or someone that's going to be like, oh yeah, how are we 10Xing this? How are we 11 out of 10 this? We're not playing small, we're playing big, to give you that lift and that juice of like, ooh, okay.

And then you recalibrate and you go back out in the world, in this 3D world where people are kind of playing small, you're playing up here, you've got to fight against the environment. Right? The environment is trying to keep us to play small every single day. News, social media, the people around us and their limiting beliefs and their trauma, and all the things. You basically have to reinvent yourself, which is what my brother did in prison. He could have stayed in thug life with all the other inmates, but he rose above it because he had a different vision for his future.

Melissa: Right.

Jeff: One of the reasons I didn't get to top 10 in the world is because I didn't live enough into that future of what it would be like to be top 10. The top 10 players in the world have six people around them. They have an agent, they have a girlfriend, they have a physio, they have branding, they have all those things. I was not living into that. I was living too much from the guy who's 150 in the world, who's a journeyman, traveling around trying to make ends meet.

Melissa: Right.

Jeff: So yes, it was an incredible career, but I didn't live enough into it. So now with what I'm doing, especially with this speaking is I've got to have the energy of someone who's like a Tony Robbins type of like, I'm on a stage in front of 20,000 people. So when I go into a room and there's 10 people in the room, I am acting like there's 20,000 people around me because someday maybe that will happen.

Melissa: Also, people get more out of what you're giving in that room if you are stepping into that. 

Jeff: Yeah. And by the way, let me be clear, I'm not getting I'm not doing it for ego to get in front of 25,000. I'm just bringing the energy of like, this is what I would feel like if there's one person in the room or 20,000. I'm bringing the same energy that I want to live in the world to create what I want, not an old energy that's like smaller, lower vibration. We are trying to raise the vibration and the frequency all the time because the world is going to keep trying to press us down, and we don't go there.

Melissa: Yeah. Right. Yeah.

Jeff: We stay up here, right? We stay above the floor. And we keep testing like, what's the ceiling? Let's keep going, let's go. Like I'm getting hyped up just talking about it, right?

Melissa: Yeah.

Jeff: Right?

Melissa: Yeah.

Jeff: Hop and shake, shake and shimmy, okay?

Melissa: This is right. This is where I get uncomfortable.

Jeff: But 11 out of 10. This is where you get uncomfortable. Like, you told me about the room you went into with all these people doing ecstatic dance, and you're like, what am I doing here?

Melissa: That was many years ago, but yes.

Jeff: Yes, but you know, like 11 out of 10 is the shake and shimmy and the hop and shake, and it's like being out there and it's being…

Melissa: No one knows what you mean…

Jeff: …it's being unapologetically yourself and not caring what the F people think allows you to 10X.

Melissa: You told me once that you would have done better if you were not afraid to grunt when you hit the ball when you were playing matches.

Jeff: I was self-conscious about grunting as a pro tennis player.

Melissa: Yeah.

Jeff: That is not 11 out of 10. I was playing 9 out of 10 or 8 out of 10. I was not playing 11 out of 10. I was not being delusional enough as a pro tennis player.

Melissa: And so you pointed out, like, all the people in the top are grunting.

Jeff: Yeah. They don't care. They're like, I'm grunting because I want to beat this guy or gal. I'm just what I'm going to do. I'm not self-conscious about this.

Melissa: Right.

Jeff: I am fully engaged in the moment so I am going to grunt. If you're self-conscious about grunting, that means you're caring about what the outside world thinks. Well, finally at 51 years old, about to be 52 at the time that we're filming this, I was thinking about this morning. I really don't give a flying F what people think. As long as I'm not harming anyone, breaking any laws, or you know, I'm going to keep breaking some rules. I'm going to I'm going to ask for forgiveness later. I'm going to keep challenging the world out there because the world is trying to keep us down. I am not playing that game.

Melissa: Yeah. 

Jeff: We're playing a different game, Melissa.

Melissa: That's right. Yes, we are.

Jeff: We're playing 11 out of 10.

Melissa: 11 out of 10.

Jeff: And so we got to get clear on like what does 11 out of 10 look like for everybody. And so for you, like besides your like how your body looks like what is 11 out of 10 for you?

Melissa: I shared with you, I gave you the Vivid Vision that I had written for my company. Um, so I gave you that, which shifted after Ben Hardy's presentation. And mostly, mostly it was about simplifying my business. That was that I realized how complex it had become over time. It was time to simplify. That was a big deal.

My, how my health. So yes, the weight, but if I could sum up with one word, really, what I was craving hard was to increase my vitality. I did not feel like I had anything in the tank. I wasn't happy with where I was for myself internally and personally. I was proud of what I've built with Velocity Work. I'm proud of my family, but I was not doing well. When I met you, I was not doing well. It was the tail end of not doing well. Um, and a big reason that the turn happened is because I started working with you.

Jeff: Some of the leaders, you know, many of the leaders that I work with and come across, whether it's a 3-hour workshop or a keynote on own your zone, or whether it's this deeper one-on-one work, so many leaders are struggling. Burnout, anxiety, they don't have that energy.

So you are like case study, perfect case study of like, I'm trying to build this business, and I don't have the vitality that I need, and I see it. And I don't know a lot of people don't know what to do about it. Well, what you do about it is you find someone like me, you find someone in your life that can help you increase the vitality and you go on a journey, your own journey. And so that's what you did.

And so now we start working together and the Own Your Zone framework gets to be revealed in the all the different ways, which I believe is the most, I always say at the beginning of my workshops, this is the most, I'm going to make the compelling argument, this is the most important work you will ever do personally and professionally. And that usually gets people to go, ooh, let me find out what this guy has to say today.

And then by the end of it, they take the Own Your Zone framework, and they're like, I can do one or two things to get more vitality and to own my zone and improve my performance. I've got some tools. So yeah, this is where it gets really good.

Melissa: Yeah, and I wasn't interested in incremental growth. I think I've been in many places in my life where that's what I was willing to do. You know, the small changes I made, any one or two of them on their own absolutely would have made a difference. I made a bunch of changes right away when you and I started working together, and it was like exponential jump for me, which was a big deal. And I couldn't have done that on my own.

There's just not there's not a world in which that was ever going to happen on my own. And that all was the goal was to increase my vitality, increase my energy, feel good on stages, and not be in the background of my mind thinking about how tight this jacket is or how stuffy I feel in my like my body, not just in my clothes. I just felt like I was starting to be trapped in my body by weight. And that all, it's like all that's the vision was a sparkle, a shine in my eye, where there's some cool quote about sunbeams shining out of your face. Like that, that like kind of light that came out of me was totally gone when I met you, and has been coming back, and I think it can come back even more, but it's been coming back.

Jeff: Sure. I mean, the sparkle, all of that, and your eyes, all of that, is related to this holistic approach to performance and well-being. Like you can't have one without the other.

Melissa: Also, performance. You, so I didn't say this, this came out of a WhatsApp conversation when we're talking about, I was articulating that in the coaches that I had come across, there are people that live at either one end of the spectrum, which is soft and somatic based, which there's nothing wrong with that, but it's they live there.

Jeff: Getting in touch with your body and your feelings and your emotions and heal your nervous system, all of that. 

Melissa: And I think that's good work, but at some point, I'm like, and, like, where what? Like, let's go. Where's the grit?

Jeff: What’s the result?

Melissa: Yeah. Then they're on the other end, there's people who totally ignore the body and nervous system.

Jeff: And emotions and feelings. And let's just get stuff done.

Melissa: You know, which I love David Goggins, but like Goggins, you know? And then there the middle is actually a very rare spot to find someone that can balance both. And that's what I figured out through researching you. It's like, this, that's why I knew you're my guy.

You know what it takes to perform at a top level, and you don't ignore your body. Your body is a part of that. And when I started working with you, the reason I was drawn to working with you was performance. You don't get to perform well in whatever you're doing, whether it's sport or speaking or growing a business, even parenting. You don't get to perform well if you are not paying attention to a few key things. And those few key things are what most people don't pay attention to.

So meeting you and knowing that both ends of the spectrum were taken care of felt like a sure bet for me to make the headway I wanted to make in a holistic way, where I'm going to work my ass off and we're going to pay attention to your body and focus on recovery and restoration, which I don't do by default.

Jeff: That was a journey I went on. How do you become the best in the world in tennis, or your best, and not lose yourself? Because a lot of pro tennis players and athletes, they lose themselves in the process. And a lot of entrepreneurs and leaders lose themselves in the process.

So I've tried to design a program, a framework, a system where we attack, we get results, and we do daily actions and fundamentals, but we also have an eye on the big prize. We have an eye on emotionally regulating and getting into our body somatically. And we have an eye on the short-term, the long-term, the soft skills, the hard, it's everything.

It's just this holistic, beautiful approach that is synthesized from all the years of me studying it myself and then applying it to others. And like I said, I think it's the most important work we'll ever do.

Melissa: Yeah. Well, cheers to an exponential vision. And yeah, it's so important and I'm glad it's it's it's an important part of the work that you do as well.

Jeff: Yeah, it's so great that we get a chance to unpack all this.

Hey, want to watch the video of this episode? Head over to Velocity Work’s YouTube channel. You’ll find the link in the show notes.

You may not know this, but there's a free guide for a process I teach called Monday Map Friday Wrap. If you go to velocitywork.com, it's all yours. It's about how to plan your time and honor your plans so that week over week, more work that moves the needle is getting done in less time. Go to velocitywork.com to get your free copy.

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